Orientation - Daniel Orozco

parents:: short story writing class

Exercise

What does the narrator look like?

Thanks Joe, I'll take it from here. (When out of ear shot).
You were just talking to Joe. He's been here forever. No-one actually knows how long. Some say he was sitting on the plot of land when they were breaking ground.

How does he seem to know so much? Well... the truth is, he doesn't actually know anything. Russell hates Amanda, and has been running marathons every year for the past year. Barry's wife isn't actually dead--the voicemails are real. And Kevin Howard? Well, Kevin Howard really is a serial killer. Everyone knows it. Just don't let on (if you do, you might be let go).

If you want to know more about Joe, I can tell you some more. Did you notice those tiny scars on his fingers, especially his pointer? Those are paper cuts. Those two holes on his neck? Vampires aren't real, staple guns are. His thick red glasses? His doctor says one more second of blue light exposure and the last cone in his retina dies.

Reading notes (second read)

1

• "you may be let go" - recurring line

• they really go all in on this uber transparency. In contrast with how a normal orientation one might expect to be.

• This Russel Nash character is the spitting image of a stereotype

• Amanda Pierce is a mix of expected and extreme

  • I'm starting to see that BDSM type stuff is really common in literature...

2

• I like the Colin Heavey part
• I will say that this kind of character development feels very niche... In a typical short story, these seems like they'd be way too shallow; they're like caricatures.
• I also like this insurance bit

3

• I don't get this Mr. Coffee thing??
• This feels almost random... unplanned. Like the author just wrote whatever came to mind. Like this "Barry Hacker's wife haunts all of us" thing
  • Or maybe I'm just missing something
• [?] How reliable is the narrator?

4

• Gwen seems like stereotypical active social lady at office.
  • But mixed up with this Penguin stuff
  • And with behind the scenes

5

• Is this view thing satirical? Seems kinda nice actually... but also seems liike a lot of buildings blocking the way
• [?] Why Anika Bloom waving back?

Thoughts

(didn't take notes right after first read)

Before second read

• This is a satirical presentation of an office, with a particular focus on characters and their interactions.
• Told in first and second person (where "you" refers to a person being oriented, and "me" is the nameless orienter)
  • Interesting style where it's presumably a dialogue, but we hear only the "me"'s side of things
  • Perhaps to emphasize the lack of voice of a new employee (or any employee for that matter)
  • Told in a very omniscient manner. Kind of a mix of omniscients and first person narration/
• I remember feeling tension keep building, like something crazy was going to happen at the end. But it ends... in a very normal manner. Nothing crazy. Very similar to how it starts.
  • [?] Why not make something crazy happen?
    • Was that also a deliberate choice? To show that, really, this is compatible with my workplace as well. That there can be crazy characters, but I just don't know all that's happening.
      • Of course, severely exaggerated, but to show a point

After second read

• Overall I liked reading this. It's refreshingly different. Reminds me that a short story can be many things.

Theme

• Seems to be a satire type thing. Exaggerated take on a typical office by being overly transparent an revealing everyone's secrets.

What would I have done differently?

• What would I have added?
  • Narrator stuff:
    • It's interesting that we end up finding out way more about the characters than the narrator (not even his name).
    • Could've been cool to have a twist, like this narrator is actually a spy or something lol. Idk.
  • What about really fully developing one of the characters?
    • It just kinda feels a little unsatisfying, that nothing really changes over the course of the story. Not much movement.